Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
