Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
