genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Randomize
