Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
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