In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
