the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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