For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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