that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
