Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Randomize