I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I want to be your penis for a week.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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