Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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