I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
