Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
So squirting runs in the family.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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