I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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