Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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