I wish I could punch you in the face.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
