Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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