And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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