Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
