I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
