Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
