Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Randomize
