We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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