I can't breathe out the right side of my face
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
