I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize
