you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
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