Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
