i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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