planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
