The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Randomize
