There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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