I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Randomize
