I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
