So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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