not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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