oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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