You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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