I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
