So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
