Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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