the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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