4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
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