My room smells like vodka and shame
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
