Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Randomize
