Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
