I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
