The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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