Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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