I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
