They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
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