they need to just BURY HIM!
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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