I don't think brook has ever known best
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
