Sry I called you an 8
nut hugger
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
